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A Dieter’s Prayer

A dieter's prayer for the holidays:

"Lord, grant me the strength that I may not fall
Into the clutches of cholesterol.

At polyunsaturates, I'll never mutter,
For the road to hell is paid with butter.

And cake is cursed and cream is awful
And Satan is hiding in every waffle.

Beelzebub is a chocolate drop
And Lucifer is a lollipop.

Teach me the evils of hollandaise,
Of pasta and jobs of mayonnaise.

And crisp fried chicken from the South --
Lord, if you love me, shut my mouth."

-- Quoted by Stephen A. Pickert, MD