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A day without sunshine is like, night.
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Remember half the people you know are below average.
Despite the high cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
Success always occurs in private and failure in full view.
The colder the x-ray table the more of your body is required on it.
38. The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to
reach it.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.
The sooner you fall behind the more time you'll have to catch up.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Change is inevitable except from vending machines.
Plan to be spontaneous--tomorrow.
Always try to be modest and be proud of it!
If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you.
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