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Do It Yourself?

A man was driving past a country estate and saw a sign on a gatepost:
"Please ring bell for caretaker."

So the man rang the bell, and an ancient fellow appeared.

"Are you the caretaker?"  Asked the man.

"Yes, I am -- may I help you?"  Responded the old man.

"Oh, no," replied the man. 
"I was just wondering why you can't ring the bell yourself."

One night at a basketball banquet the president of a junior college
was congratulating the coach and team profusely.

The beaming coach asked the president,
"Would you still like me as much if we didn't win?"

"I'd like you as much," the President replied.
"I'd just miss having you around."

A young lady was explaining to a friend the reason
for breaking her engagement to her wealthy fiance.

"I saw him in a swimsuit the other day and he looked so different without his wallet."