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Old Age Is...
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Old age is when a person notices that his shoelace is untied and asks himself:
"Is there anything else I can do down there when I lean over to tie by shoelace?"
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The little boy asked his grandfather if he had been in the ark with Noah.
The grandfather chuckled a little and told his grandson that he was not on the ark.
The confused grandson asked, "Then why didn't you drown, Grandpa?"
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A lady celebrating her 102nd birthday was asked
what she enjoyed most about her advanced age.
"The lack of peer pressure, "she replied.
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Anybody who can still do at 60 what he was doing at 20 wasn't doing much at 20.
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Man is the only creature who spends two-thirds of his lifetime saving up for old age,
and the last third denying that it has arrived.
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Old folks are worth a fortune, with silver in their hair, gold in their teeth,
stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet, and gas in their stomachs.
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John: "How does an 80-year-old man like you get a gorgeous 25-year-old bride?"
Harry: "I told her I was 90!"
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An elderly lady was filling out the registration form at a doctor's office.
After the address the form inquired about her, "ZIP."
She answered: "Not bad for my age."
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