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Old Age Is...

Old age is when a person notices that his shoelace is untied and asks himself:

"Is there anything else I can do down there when I lean over to tie by shoelace?" 

The little boy asked his grandfather if he had been in the ark with Noah.

The grandfather chuckled a little and told his grandson that he was not on the ark.

The confused grandson asked, "Then why didn't you drown, Grandpa?"

A lady celebrating her 102nd birthday was asked
what she enjoyed most about her advanced age.

"The lack of peer pressure, "she replied.

Anybody who can still do at 60 what he was doing at 20 wasn't doing much at 20.

Man is the only creature who spends two-thirds of his lifetime saving up for old age,
and the last third denying that it has arrived.

Old folks are worth a fortune, with silver in their hair, gold in their teeth,
stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet, and gas in their stomachs.

John: "How does an 80-year-old man like you get a gorgeous 25-year-old bride?"
Harry: "I told her I was 90!"

An elderly lady was filling out the registration form at a doctor's office.

After the address the form inquired about her, "ZIP."

She answered: "Not bad for my age."